some update

the bbq was fun...
thanz Sebastian for the invitation, thanz all of u for the fun i had...
and the funny powered faces...lolz...
the only nt fun part is Tony switch off my light when i am in the toliet...tt hell FREAK ME OUT...dun do tt again...
i almost cried...i am really scared off dark n i am NT KIDDING...

some thing is nt for me to comment on but dissappointed to noe...
I knew something will happen after she is gone...
but I did nt expect to be tt worst off...
things changes when she left my world...
things r nv the same...

sometime, once u lost someone or something they ain't coming back again...
no matter hw many pple sae time will heal but it a part of me tt was cut off literally...
dun tell me u understand...u dun...u dun understand hw it feel to be looking at her leaving further away from u day by day n nothing u can do to help...dun tell me urs is much worst off...i noe it hurts for u but u dun noe hw pain i am in, like i dun noe urs...so dun sae u UNDERSTAND...

to add on to the alreadi lost part, things changes...
pple changes...n it will nv be the same again...
i hate to noe, i am griefing for my lost n i am nt done wif tt dun add on to the alreadi hurting like hell wound...

i hell noe drinking is nt the wae...but like i care...i juz want to run away...
everything juz tigger off the pain, the scene in the proposal where the grandma is dying off...it juz make me cry when i thought she is really dying...
got to noe she onli acting, i juz got pissed off over a moive...haha...i noe it sound stupid...but can u dun play wif such stupid thing...it ain't funny for some...